It's a Bird, It's a Plane; No, It's a Twilight Fangirl!

I know it's been a while since I've posted and all I have to say to that is; DWI!!! Read my latest stint in Hell and scream in horror! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!


It was Friday at lunch time. It was a normal lunch, like any other. There was laughter, crude jokes, and frequent 'shushing'. And then it happened. The world ended and nobody noticed. Twilight the DVD was being released at midnight and already Miya, Monica, and Stephanie were making plans to go and buy it.

Obviously I laughed at them. "Why are you going to wait up until midnight in order to buy the DVD when there are much more 'cost effective' way to see it. Miya knew what I was talking about but it didn't really matter. They were going, however illogical and stupid it was. So I decided that I'd go to, having nothing else to do at midnight except sleep.

After school I found out that I'd have to pay $26 if I wanted to get into the mall after hours to wait in line for them. Yea, right. Like I'm going to pay $26 to wait for a movie I've already seen like three times.

So I told Miya good luck with her purchase and we hung up.

Fast forward to 11:09. I'm on the computer when I decide to call her and see what's happening with the fangirls. I hear screaming through the phone and what sounded like an enormous battle. But Miya inevitably hung up on me and I stared at the phone, annoyed that she had done it again (it was the 5th time).

So imagine my surprise when I get a call back and it's Monica calling to tell me to come and wait with them, there weren't any guards watching the doors.

I called a cab and we were on our way.

I didn't get there until about 11:45 but they were fairly back in line so it was a good wait. While I was there, I met Monica's much cooler 14 year old cousin. We passed the time having really really hot ***... conversation.

There were girls decked out in tribal tattoos and war paint, Black cloth and eyeliner, Mother's with their hyper active infants, and the rare man looking woman.

I grabbed handfuls and pocketfuls of candy to bring home and had to speak softly so Monica's little sister couldn't hear all of the ***** jokes I was panting into Miya's ear.

She was pretty annoyed with me because of my frequent reminders of h0w 'smart' they were to purchase a $26 DVD of a Brit, a B****, and a Boy.

But finally they all bought their copies of Twilight. I was posted at the door, screaming their names and pointing at them as they came out; totally embarrassing.

There was crying, and laughing, and a gout of hellfire as one girl was dragged down into hell. Probably sold her soul for the chance to jump to the front of the line.

We all proceeded to the exit and headed home; Miay, Monica, and her cousin/sister piled into their clown car and Stephanie vanished into thin air; maybe Edward took her.

I called a cab, then decided not to wait and caught one at the transit.

Hooray for dodging traffic.

Lloydisms of the Day:

• Attempting to yell over a mass of screaming Twilight famgirls is like trying to raise the dead; impossible so don't even bother trying.
• When you wake your father up at 11:15 in order to tell him you're leaving and won't be back until after 12 am, always have a good excuse and a bottle of chloroform.
• Watching fangirls fall into convulsions on a Mall floor in the middle of a release is almost a fun as watching her get dragged along as the line moves up.
• When you hear that Edward crowed surfed on a bunch of fangirls and you aren't surprised you know you've gotten jaded.

Au Revoir